hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize