I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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