Where is the hickey?
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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