One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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