Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
