this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
