I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
