I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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