i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
