I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
