My liver just broke up with me...
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
