it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
