whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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