And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
