So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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