THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Can you bring me the toilet please
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
