Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
