how can u be prego again
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Randomize
