dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
