isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?â€
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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