Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
