Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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