saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
