Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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