Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
