Are we in a gay sports bar?
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
two words...techno handjob
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
