It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
