wanna go halves on a baby?
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
