Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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