So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
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