Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize