i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize