what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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