She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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