Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
