It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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