He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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