You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize