just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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