i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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