Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
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