i think my mom watched the whole time
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
