I don't think brook has ever known best
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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