Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Randomize