I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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