Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
