There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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