Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
