I'm laying in your front yard are you home
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
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