Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
